There are different kinds of love. You don’t have the same emotion for your ugly, rug-humping dog as you do for your best friend from middle school. You don’t have the same reaction to the cute guy at Starbucks as you do for the amazing old lady who walks around in her underwear with the shades up.
Love is this weird thing that is totally abstract, yet completely tangible. And, we all relate with it differently.
Once someone told me that how a language deals with the emotion of love says something about the people who speak it. For example, in Italian, there are at least three different terms for the concept of love – amo, voglio, and addoro. In Latin, there are four – philia, eros, storge, and agape. In English? Welp. We have the one….
Is it any wonder that we get so confused about how we feel about people? If I tell you I love you, what’s the likelihood that our limited, stilted English word won’t quite convey what I’m trying to say? Odds are good that there will be confusion.
And so, we talk around how we feel. Since we don’t have a word that really makes us clear, we have to use metaphors and symbols to really talk about what we mean.
I adore you.
I worship you.
I appreciate you.
I trust you.
I understand you.
But, although these are all nice verbs, they don’t really encompass what we’re really trying to say. Or at least, what I’m trying to say.
The truth is, I smorgentirfen you.
Perhaps you are unfamiliar with the term. I’ll explain.
When you smorgentirfen someone, you think they’re incredible. You are impressed by their intellect, their humor, and their talent. You are slightly obsessed with them, but not so much that you start trying to find where they live. You wonder about them. You wonder if they’re wondering about you. You try to find reasons to invite them out for hot chocolate and make them laugh.
Because the act of smorgentirfen is not inherently sexual in nature, it can happen to almost anyone at anytime. Often confused by women as a “girl crush” or men as a “bromance,” smorgentirfen is deeper and more lasting than either of those terms. It can lead to additional forms of love, but is completely self-sustaining. It is closely linked to adoration, but also friendship, marriage, and respect.
In my Twitter absence, I have come to truly understand how deeply I’ve fallen into smorgentirfen with many of you. And, I’ve also begun to see how truly consuming it can be.
I hope you’re not bothered by my smorgentirfenism towards you. I’m not sure how to stop it. But, I do know that the more I try to engage in my own life, the less it controls my decisions. You should know, though, that I will always remember you as my first smorgentif. And that’s a special bond that no one can break.